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Journal Entry: Wed Nov 18, 2009, 8:57 PM

Why are Swedish people so darn good at singing? I: IT'S NOT FAIR /SOB
(Note: Go to "32 songs in 8 minutes" to see what I'm talking about, though the rest of his videos are awesome, as well.)

So I was going to use this space for complaining, like the jaded, cynical misanthrope that I am, about people who are way too dependent on other people. And about how I can't wait until they get screwed over in the real world.

But instead, I'd like to make a brief comment on anime where the cynical character becomes more caring and happy through the intensively persistent friendship/love of a naive, clingy character: IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN. : Why? Because cynical people tend to hate society even more when they come across such people.

Just like in a relationship where a guy persists after a girl that clearly does not like him, constant devotion does not equal a softening of the heart.

It is blatantly over-romanticized and unrealistic.

And now, the appropriate reaction to this boils down to three choices:

All of which are false, SO HA, THE JOKE'S ON YOU.

...In other news, I've accepted the possibility that I may never be married. Which is kind of sad to me, because I hadn't planned on being lonely for the rest of my life. OTL

But seeing as how my choices have been severely limited (not the least by the fact that asexual partners are hard to find), I've already started to consider that I may have to get a good-paying job that I could possibly hate in order to support myself. Also, I may have to let go of my dreams of adoption, although I won't give that up easily.

It's a little frustrating identifying as having no or severely limited sexual desire for either gender, because we get very little representation in the media and are misunderstood just as much (if not more) than homosexual people. And we certainly aren't as well-known as homosexuals.

That being said, it was kind of a relief when I finally realized what to identify with (a similar feeling to when I figured out that I was atheist). |D Finally, an an explanation for how awkward and uncaring I've felt about sex for all these years. Not to mention all of my "incredibly ace moments" I've racked up...

: ................But now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever mentioned asexuality on my main dA account, even though I've known it for quite a while. Whatever. It's never too late to come out of the closet, lol. **shot**



Maybe next time, I'll actually tell an interesting story about the girl in my piano class who constantly tells me about her sex life and how much she makes me want to commit suicide. ITALUV GAINED +4 CYNICISM!

WikiART CSS by paranthasis

  • Listening to: Killer Queen
  • Reading: Crime and Punishment (my new, pretty copy CB)
  • Playing: Professor Layton and the Curious Village
  • Eating: jam-filled muffin
  • Drinking: decaf English Breakfast tea
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Zeenigami Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2009
I'm pretty sure I'd go with 3. ALL OF THE ABOVE
Ishdia Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2009
Haha, I know how you feel. xD The idea of sex has actually upset me, one: Because I mean ewewewewewEW, because of my age and the idiots that surround me in classes, I know lots about it through PSHE and all I can say is JESUSCHRISTEW. XD It's enough to put you off forever.
And also in the fact that in TV shows, every one is expected to have sex. o_o I remember watching an episode of Scrubs (a comedy show is a brilliant place to learn life lessons from! 8B) that some one didn't want to have sex because they didn't feel ready for it, and they were shown as unusual and annoying. Lesson in life: When they say so, drop your pants! Especially if you're on TV. :O

That and I hate the persistant types, I don't believe there's any real life situation where it's really worked or not ended in a restraining order, I just think it's people really wanting others to be lusting after them 24/7. There's a girl in school who is so unbelievably persistant about wanting to hug me it is beyond annoying. -_- It only pisses me off even more not only because she smells like something had a turd and died on her but because people really don't realise do not want means do not want. 8B I wouldn't really mind sex so much if every one followed the Christian idea(not trying to preach, btw, I'm defenitly not Christian xD) of only have sex when you want to have babies/get closer to the one you truly love. Not the one with the best pickup line in a bar. -_-

But one ridiculously long reply later, I do think it's funny that asexual is a word that you don't really hear that often. I actually told one of my friends that I wasn't interested in sex and the look of shock on their face was priceless. xD It seems the sort of thing that warrants a public service announcement. But being cynical is fun, I have to say. :D

And now I'm done wasting your time.
ThornheartCat Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009  Student
Well, from a more optimistic point of view, those blatantly romanticized stories are better than Twilight. :iconimhappyplz:

Well, I admit I'm a fan of some of them. They can be pretty damn good if told well. Good examples are Kanon, AIR, and CLANNAD. The heroines don't really un-cynicify (I KNOW THAT IS NOT A WORD, I DO NOT CARE) the hero, it's more that they complement them well. I think me and my friends do that: if one of us is being too negative, we'll counter it and cheer each other up. It's like that, if that makes any sense. And there's other heroines and their stories to listen to.

And as for asexuality, I'm not asexual, though I DEFINITELY wouldn't want to hear about the sex lives of people I know. X_X And as for getting married, meh, not everyone needs to get married. And you should totally go for adoption, there's lots of kids out there that need it. Don't give up on your dreams!
RokxMcShadow Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009  Student General Artist
Honestly I used to think exactly the same.

I see why you would see sex as disgusting or simply not wanting it.

And seriously the fault of sex being seen that way is of the sex industry.
Fact is Love changes the bruatality of sex , I honestly beleive this since it's changing me.

Most people just care about feeling good, that's why they like sex so much. They're selfish and they don't know ANYTHING about love. True love not the Twilight concept of it -.- GEEZ.

As I see things you still see sex as the mere act of pleasure , selfish pleasure... Most of it without any care of each other really.

I'm not saying you'll change, just stating how close the resemblance between how you think with how I used to think.

I don't think asexuality is a bad thing, but I beleive that sex can become less "icky" and more emotional.

Please don't discard the chance of falling in love. Everyone deserves to feel love, the true one. And no matter how long or who you are, I'm sure it WILL happen.

And even if you discard the chance of ever considering on having sex, don't forbid yourself of falling in love.

I'll stfu now , since you're probably going to think I'm a sissy shit who beleives in princess stories 8which I'm not) and is an hypocrit who thinks herself better then others :I .

I wouldn't blame you for thinking any of that or more , I'll leave you now to your life OuO.

Ps: I felt the need to comment when seeing how brave you were by bringing this topic up~
Your trully an inspiration Ita ^^, .
ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009
Trust me, I don't think of you as a sissy or a hypocrite. |D Despite how it might seem, I'm a romantic in my own way, and I haven't disowned the idea of falling in love.

I see what you're saying, and I understand that people have different views on sex. To some, it's just pleasure, and to others, it's a connection between man and woman.
I may not desire sex for myself, but I see no problem in other people having it, and I don't believe it's a horrible thing. (Though, I hate the way it's everywhere in the media.) I get how people find the spiritual and romantic connection that it brings for a couple.
If I ever find an asexual man that I fall in love with, we'll surely find other ways of showing our affection. :)

And thanks? |D I don't think I'm particularly brave or anything, haha. I just felt like writing about it, so I did.
RokxMcShadow Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2009  Student General Artist
XD that's a releif wouldn't want to come off sounding as such XP.
I'm glad you haven't throwned the idea of falling in love away, because it would be a shame to give up on such a thing, in my opinion.

I agree with your point of it being everywhere nowadays.I think it's becoming more of a simple act that is starting to integrate itself in society and honestly when it gets to the point where we have litle kids making horrenduous statements only a teenager moron would say and get to harassing someone it just makes me want to scream out loud like an old timer "WHAT HAS OUR SOCIETY COME TO?!" .__. ... I fear for the next generations (I'm such an old fart XD).

I wish you luck to find someone whom you will love thruthfully and that will love you back to the point of understanding your position on all of this ^^, .

XD Brave people are the ones who don't appear brave but manage to share such things with others, that will help by making them relate to it.
FanFantasy Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Why do I think that whole cynicXclinging thing is a jab at twilight? *Ahem* Yes, I agree with both though.
SexyKill69 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
I just read your stickers....My response....

KAWAII DESU KAWAII DESU KAWAII DESU...*Hours later* Needs more Desu.

"Make pairings that make sense!"

Never. That one person you saw in episode 12 for like 5 seconds will have relations with the hero's dog...that is all.
And Yes that big breasted woman will fall obsessiveley in love with a character she's never met before.

*turns around and rapes your bishies* you have good taste.
*licks Kaito*

Anyway Hail Hetalia. *cheers*
ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009
You're a very annoying/crude person, and I don't particularly enjoy your comments. Please go troll someone else.
SexyKill69 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
I am not trolling. I am simply stating my opinion on something you posted for everyone that has internet to see. Don't like it? Don't post.

Jeez, can no one take critism anymore?
ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2009
:\ It's not criticism; it's just annoying.
SexyKill69 Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
It is critism. You are just very bad at taking it. Annoying would be, "YOU SCUK I HAET YOU"
notice the misspellings and over used caps lock.
Take a chill pill Darling.
SexyKill69 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
OH GOD YOU'RE A /B/TARD! *runs away screaming*

no really I should have guessed. >____>

And you do know that asexuality means being able to reproduce by yourself yes?

I used to think I had no sexual preference or desire...then I realized I had just desensitized myself...

But yes yes...your person sounds very cool. T_T I'm supossing you want your fans imagene you as some uncaring, cool, and collected person, with no interest in anything really. *dies* i_i In short I like you but hate your attitude.

But who cares right?

Anyway...none of us are going to get married. We're teenage women dancing around men in skirts raping other men skirts, sitting at home with our various assortments of teas and anime goodies...We're basically the asian version of Trekkies...or in lamest terms "Weabos"

ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009

No, I am not a /b/tard. I am not even a 4channer.

Asexual reproduction means being able to reproduce without having sex. Asexuality means having limited to no sexual desire. Google it.

My "person"...? I'm guessing you mean "personality". And no, it's not very cool; I don't kid myself by thinking that I'm cool.
People can think whatever they want about me, really. If I really wanted for people to like me, I wouldn't put up journals like this, would I? :) I'm not the kind of attention whore would write things I don't really think or feel just to get people to like me.

Please do not group me in with the weaboos/wapanese/japanophiles/whatever-you-want-to-call-them. I am a Japanese person who is proud of my culture and race, and has always been. Nothing more, nothing less.

Lastly, it's cool if you hate me or my attitude (although I'm not sure how you can like someone but hate their attitude), I just wanted to clarify some things.
SexyKill69 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Well I am sorry to have mistaken you, but many of your tendencies for comedy originate from that site. What else am I to assume? As I said I apologize.

Yes Asexual Reproduction means that, but you called yourself Asexual.
ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2009
Yes, I know that most of these memes originated from 4chan, but I would never associate with a website like that. It's reputation alone is enough to keep me away.

Because we call ourselves asexual, and most people understand the difference. It's called "context clues".
If you don't like it, complain to whoever coined the term.
SexyKill69 Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Well I'm glad to hear it. ^ ^

Well I'm sorry to have offended you. >_> I was just commenting. And I never said I didn't like it. Honestly I usually leave you excellant reveiws.
Where is your confidence woman! To still be arguing with the likes of me? Unheard of!ಠ_ಠ
Marnaynna Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2009
*asexual brofissst*
having some problems with myself, but i won't bore you or make you bleed with the details. I'm a sort of cynical optimist in general, if you will, so...
ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009
lol, thank you. Not that I don't feel bad for other people's problems, but it's hard to reply to huge paragraphs.
I tend to lean more towards pessimism, but mostly I just try to be realistic. :)
DeepBluePool Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
I've spent my childhood under strict instructions not to go outside, in fear of being "raped"... I find it funny, because a person like me is unlikely to

/awkward silence/ I'm not appealing. Even with that, it's still driven into my brain: sex=BAD. PAINFUL. BAD CONSEQUENCES.

Well, anyways. I bet you still have enough time to decide whether you want to be truly asexual or not(unless you've already FIRMLY decided)...and even if you decideto be, it doesn't really matter if you dislike intercourse.

'Tis normal life. I'm thinking you know already, though, so...*end of uselessly long rant*
PsychicInTraining Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Yes, I'm not alone! I don't want to get married either.
This sounds absolutely immature and stupid to say, but for me it still holds true: I think sex is disgusting and gross. And that's all.


Of course, being well aware that others think differently, I just give them the "Cool story bro" reaction. Peace.

But the term asexual sounds kinda gross to me too, because when I first learned about it in science, the books stated that if you were asexual you basically gave birth from parts of your body continuously, like a baby growing out of your leg. -shudders-
rikuroth Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
Id so marry you were so aliiikee ;D *PEW* Lawl ._. *posing off of shot ;))*
karinchan3392 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
i dont get why people are so interested in sex at this point in time when they still have like a good 20 to 25 to reproduce and have little bundles of vomit and poo :/
N30N-Night Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2009
xD I can imagine it now.

"What is it doc?"
"It's... it's a... a bundle of vomit and poo."
">A> Do not want"
karinchan3392 Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2009
Osonos-Crimson-Heart Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh, Iturh, you silly girl...
There are plenty of people who dislike the idea of sex. : D Lol. Don't worry, I'm sure you'll get married to a fellow asexual person. o.e Though I'd rather use the term "Anti-sex" because I'm obsessed with 1984, heh.. .u.;
And I'm sure I read your journal wrong! <3
Oh well.
Good luck~ lol
N30N-Night Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
At first I was all:

But then I was all:
Oh she meant not sexually interested.

I find it funny, because with all (THAT STATEMENT IS FALSE, AS I AM A MALE, AND IT'S ONLY LIKE 98% OF) the girls I have ever found myself attracted to, I would never imagine getting down with them. o lawd.

But yeah, once my parents tried to talk to me about having RELATIONS (yes, I feel slightly uncomfortable saying sex on the intarwebz), I lost most interest in having it anytime soon.
sweet god, those talks will forever haunt me.
ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009

That's kind of a relief to hear, though, since it's pretty much implied that all men care about is doing it with women. I didn't really believe something that extreme, but....hey, I'm not a guy, so what do I know? :\

lol, my mom tried to give me the talk twice, and both times I was totally uninterested. I didn't even really make the connection between sex and reproduction until the eighth grade or so. (Despite all this, I have no problem saying "sex". I wonder why? |D;; )
Streganonazi Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
Cool story, bro-- i am listening to killer queen toooooooo! woooo boiiii... :heart:

i just feel uncomfortable in romantic situations due to deeply rooted trust issues... CYNISM: WOOOO BOIII
Dragonfire76 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
There's still hope for you getting married. Just wait until you're so old that he can't get it up anyway. /SHOT
MasterKagura Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009

XD I'm pretty assexual myself. Sure, I think guys are hot, especially guys from a certain tv series called Supernatural, but I've never hit the "OMGHORMONESSEXSEXSEX" stage. I don't really plan to.
sute-ki Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
Cool story , bro.
AlekPixi Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009  Student Writer
I'm asexual too, don't worry about it ^^ When I become a famous mass-murderer, I'll let the media know about the asexuals ;)
SexyKill69 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
lol nice icon bro.
I once thought like too...But then I became boring.
AlekPixi Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2009  Student Writer
Thanks ^^
And noone is ever boring, you just have to look at them from another angle :D
... it sounded kinda perverted, but well, it's something we say in Denmark ^^;
AquaPunk0 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
Ah, I didn't think any of the 3 choices. Do I win a Prize :D?

Also, I totally agree with you on the a-sexuality front. Way too little screen time.

I do have maternal instincts which translates to 'I want a baby but no sex plz'. And I am emotionally attracted to people...

I'd like a relationship I suppose, just a purely emotional one(So probably no marriage for me either!).

Is there a word for that? I pretty much have to identify as an emotionally pansexual, physically asexual person.

And I have to explain both of those orz.
ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
**awards with 50 points**

Yeah, I'm still waiting for a movie (that isn't for little kids) to come out with no gross kissing scenes, and where the most anyone ever does is hold hands. I: **wishful thinking**

Agreed; as for me, I really want to adopt, since I have no desire to produce my own kids (also, along with sex, I find pregnancy disturbing). And I still want a partner when I'm older, because I do have romantic feelings. ; x ;

Actually, there is a word for it: "panromantic asexual". |D
Saladchan Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
I'm not asexual, but I'm not really interested in having sex with anyone... I think society overemphasizes the importance of sex. :/ I have a friend who's asexual. She's funny.

"Just like in a relationship where a guy persists after a girl that clearly does not like him, constant devotion does not equal a softening of the heart." Actually, Ita, it can. My mom's a cashier (second job, my Dad is an engineer or something. I'm not sure what he does right now. He's been everything.) and once an elderly couple came in. They'd been married for years, and it's all because the husband asked the wife to marry him the first time he saw her. She said no. So he asked every day for a year, and finally she said yes! So apparently, it does work. Just not often.
The-Lute-Fox Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
A good explanation of why for most SEX= DO WANT. Sometimes videos games are just good like that. If you played the game and have seen this already, sorry. But sometimes, things can be revisited.
Also, it starts around 1 min 50 secs in ends around 2 mins 10 secs (so short, but the rest of it is pretty good).
Tirinity Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009  Hobbyist Digital Artist
"I move away from the guitar to breathe in" :rofl: This guy knows his memes hahaha~
ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2009
I know, right? XDDD I laughed so hard at that.
MikuAku Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
yay! you're eating a stuffin! i have a whole bunch of stores like that where i live.

anyway, back to topic, i watched that video too, and i had the EXACT same reaction xD
animehamster Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
Another asexual?! 0:

We are small in numbers, and so rare.
Band together much? =w=;;

But I can relate, having a limited attraction to either gender. It's difficult to explain, but I've deduced the asexulity to being... bi. ._.

Basically speaking, the term asexual is scientifically saying that we can reproduce without having another partner (now wouldn't that be interesting to think about), but it's also a statement just saying that we're not interested.

That may change over time but because of the fact that we had no sexual preference before means we could go either way. :\

That's technically speaking, of course.
ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
Minority's gotta stick together. U:

Yeah, I understand. For a while I wondered if I was actually bi or possibly even gay, since I had such limited desires for men. But then I discovered asexuality. |D So it's all good now.

I can totally reproduce by budding, no lie. **SHOT**
animehamster Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
Small numbers usually overtake the main population in no time.
Maybe we'll take over the world or something. .w.

Same here but after I questioned my sexuality to a point where I drove myself insane, I decided that being asexual was just the way to go. So yeah, everything is all good now. =w=

0: ...Clones of Italuv... I think it'll solely be you who takes over the world.
ItaLuv Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
True that. |D I figure that since homosexuality is becoming more accepted, despite all of the homophobia of past years, asexuality will get it's chance in the spotlight eventually.
And then we can put a proper censor in television and movies. <3

OH GOD, all the questioning. I totally feel you on that; I questioned myself until I wondered why sex even mattered so much anyways. (I can't remember, but that may have been the point where I realized I was asexual. |D)

The fourth Reich. It could happen. U: **SHOT**
animehamster Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2009
I think people just need to get over their fear. It's not like they're going to hurt you (unless they're psycho but honestly, what are the chances of that happening?). The worst possibly thing the average homosexual can do is hit on you.
But a proper censor would be greatly appreciated. <3~

From previous experiences, I thought I was straight but the past few years say otherwise. I just suddenly lost interest in anyone. You bring up a good point though: does gender even matter in the situation when it comes down to it?

I'll spread the word. o7 -shot-
geonex Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009  Student General Artist
ah it's okay, i do agree that asexuals are more under adressed than homosexuals from my stand point, we get allot of coverage but i've known no one adressing asexuality. it's pretty damin unjust.
i'm sure that you'll find someone, heck the best relationships i've had were more or less asexual,i don't know if this will help but i've found that distance is the key to an emotionaly strong relationship, true it's not the best thing but it's just what i've found. seriously, what would you think of yourself for giveing up on just about everything. even if you can't get a partner, if you persever in your job you may be able to adopt a child. i'm not expecting a fairy tale, but where's the fun in giving up.
i have to admit i do like the idea of it, i'd like more relationships to be like that, and sometime's i think i should really just be asexual. unfortunatly i'm pretty sure i like sex. which is a suprizing FML.
oh man, sorry for the ultra long comment...
MistyMonstress Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2009
as you can see from other comments: there are quite a few people considering themselfes as asexual. So theres a chance that you meet someone and fall in love with them and marry and never ever have sex.... ^^ Or at least meet someone you really like and share a flat with them, that can be pretty marriage-like, too. :)

And hey, you have got that strange person called "Internet" to help you finding other people with the same not-interests ;). I heard the Internet-guy does his job damn good! So good luck! :D
ChibiKitsuneArtist Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2009  Student Filmographer
That is cool. If you don't have money,then you can't eat. Life sucks hard in that way. Thanks for thinking of adoption, nobody seems to anymore. Considor kids older than ten, they rarely get adopted.

On the other hand though....

I sure you just have meet the right person for you. I don't know how old you are but there is still time! Don't give up on you dreams. If you have to, a least make it a hobby.

Last thing, I don't think it's unusally for people not to get marry. Or have kids. Sometimes it's just what life through at you.
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Submitted on
November 18, 2009